The world is getting smaller due to social media. We have a great desire to connect with others by any means necessary. We can be "friends" with many people that we may not otherwise have time for during our busy workweeks. We can "follow" men and women on Twitter that we have never actually met, but that we may share common interests with. Pinterest gives us opportunities to view and share the creativity of others.
Meanwhile, we pull into our driveways after work or a trip to the grocery store and head inside to shut the world out. We barely know our neighbors anymore, especially in neighborhoods that are always in transition. But when the chips are down, we all recognize our need for deep meaningful friendships. When we have no one to talk to, that is when we wish we had someone to confide in. While it is rare to find people we can trust in this way, it is possible. Choosing wisely may be the hardest part as we run into many who are not trustworthy with our most secret struggles, doubts or fears. Some lack the compassion that we need and can quickly become written off, even though they themselves need compassion and companionship.
As much as I'd like to think that my life is a partially opened book, I know that there are very few whom I have let walk with me in the unpretty areas of my life. Inviting anyone into my inner sanctum is a struggle at best, and when I have let my guard down, I have sometimes been hurt deeply. The delicate balance between keeping others at arm’s length and actually inviting those we trust into our more private lives is teetering at best. Sometimes we make no effort. Other times we may try too hard. Either way we may end up with more frustration than friends.
Although we recognize the need for deep, meaningful friendships, it is sometimes hard to develop friendships based on the amount of time we are able to spend with others. Rarely, are we able to have these types of friendships with our co-workers. Church offers at least some fleeting relationships with those we have common ideals with, but the amount of time spent there limits our ability to nurture anything more than a passing thought about with whom we could become better acquainted. So if we all stay at arm’s length, than we are still not experiencing authentic community with other believers as the Bible recommends that we do.
Friendships are never easy and take time to grow, but if we do not spend time with each other, then we may never get there. Unfortunately, we all tend to float around and make small talk, rather than seek out ways to spend more time together and nurture deeper relationships with others. (I would rather read a good book). The few meaningful friendships we do have are probably still held away from our inner barriers. We doubt that anyone can truly be trusted and our deepest, darkest issues are not easily discussed with just anybody. And that is the predicament we find ourselves in. We want friends but not ones that get into our business. Or we want deep relationships with others but struggle with trusting anyone too deeply. Where do we go from here? If we do not or will not let down our guard, we will not develop the close companionship that we crave and were designed for.
He was a prince about to give up his throne, but he did not know it yet. He was a courageous leader who was willing to do what his father, the king, would not (1 Samuel 14:1-15). His father's disobedience would cost him his throne (1 Samuel 13:7-14) and yet he befriended the freshly anointed king-in-waiting (1 Samuel 18:1-4). Despite his father's jealousy of David, Jonathan's strong bond of friendship with him included protection and a love that was stronger than any ambitions Jonathan had for his own life. This solemn pact would last for the rest of his life, as Jonathan's continued friendship kept David from the harmful reach of his father, Saul.
What would cause a prince to give up his throne for a man he had never met? What kind of love as a friend could help him to befriend the new companion in his life? How could he give up his dreams in order for his friend to prosper? A clue is given to us in 1 Samuel 20:17, where it is stated that Jonathan loved David as he loved himself. This is the same call that Jesus repeated to his disciples and yet something that seems to be lacking in most friendships today. The bond of love that they had for each other caused Jonathan to plead with his father to not kill David. He also helped David escape and withstood his father's wrath. So when his father was cursing him, he still sought David's greater good more than his own comfort and the promise of a throne. What a Friend!
Would you or I be willing to give up the promise of a safe, comfortable life; a life free from worry or the stress of the common man, in order to maintain a friendship with someone who was coming to take it all away? Do we esteem others and hold them in higher regard than ourselves? Do we seek the greater good of others, regardless of the personal cost? Is our love for our friends, one that goes beyond the most basic description of friendship? Are we willing to give of ourselves to the point that it costs us some of our comforts? I think deep down we all need a Friend like Jonathan was to David. I know that is the kind of friend that I want to be…..
Meanwhile, we pull into our driveways after work or a trip to the grocery store and head inside to shut the world out. We barely know our neighbors anymore, especially in neighborhoods that are always in transition. But when the chips are down, we all recognize our need for deep meaningful friendships. When we have no one to talk to, that is when we wish we had someone to confide in. While it is rare to find people we can trust in this way, it is possible. Choosing wisely may be the hardest part as we run into many who are not trustworthy with our most secret struggles, doubts or fears. Some lack the compassion that we need and can quickly become written off, even though they themselves need compassion and companionship.
As much as I'd like to think that my life is a partially opened book, I know that there are very few whom I have let walk with me in the unpretty areas of my life. Inviting anyone into my inner sanctum is a struggle at best, and when I have let my guard down, I have sometimes been hurt deeply. The delicate balance between keeping others at arm’s length and actually inviting those we trust into our more private lives is teetering at best. Sometimes we make no effort. Other times we may try too hard. Either way we may end up with more frustration than friends.
Although we recognize the need for deep, meaningful friendships, it is sometimes hard to develop friendships based on the amount of time we are able to spend with others. Rarely, are we able to have these types of friendships with our co-workers. Church offers at least some fleeting relationships with those we have common ideals with, but the amount of time spent there limits our ability to nurture anything more than a passing thought about with whom we could become better acquainted. So if we all stay at arm’s length, than we are still not experiencing authentic community with other believers as the Bible recommends that we do.
Friendships are never easy and take time to grow, but if we do not spend time with each other, then we may never get there. Unfortunately, we all tend to float around and make small talk, rather than seek out ways to spend more time together and nurture deeper relationships with others. (I would rather read a good book). The few meaningful friendships we do have are probably still held away from our inner barriers. We doubt that anyone can truly be trusted and our deepest, darkest issues are not easily discussed with just anybody. And that is the predicament we find ourselves in. We want friends but not ones that get into our business. Or we want deep relationships with others but struggle with trusting anyone too deeply. Where do we go from here? If we do not or will not let down our guard, we will not develop the close companionship that we crave and were designed for.
He was a prince about to give up his throne, but he did not know it yet. He was a courageous leader who was willing to do what his father, the king, would not (1 Samuel 14:1-15). His father's disobedience would cost him his throne (1 Samuel 13:7-14) and yet he befriended the freshly anointed king-in-waiting (1 Samuel 18:1-4). Despite his father's jealousy of David, Jonathan's strong bond of friendship with him included protection and a love that was stronger than any ambitions Jonathan had for his own life. This solemn pact would last for the rest of his life, as Jonathan's continued friendship kept David from the harmful reach of his father, Saul.
What would cause a prince to give up his throne for a man he had never met? What kind of love as a friend could help him to befriend the new companion in his life? How could he give up his dreams in order for his friend to prosper? A clue is given to us in 1 Samuel 20:17, where it is stated that Jonathan loved David as he loved himself. This is the same call that Jesus repeated to his disciples and yet something that seems to be lacking in most friendships today. The bond of love that they had for each other caused Jonathan to plead with his father to not kill David. He also helped David escape and withstood his father's wrath. So when his father was cursing him, he still sought David's greater good more than his own comfort and the promise of a throne. What a Friend!
Would you or I be willing to give up the promise of a safe, comfortable life; a life free from worry or the stress of the common man, in order to maintain a friendship with someone who was coming to take it all away? Do we esteem others and hold them in higher regard than ourselves? Do we seek the greater good of others, regardless of the personal cost? Is our love for our friends, one that goes beyond the most basic description of friendship? Are we willing to give of ourselves to the point that it costs us some of our comforts? I think deep down we all need a Friend like Jonathan was to David. I know that is the kind of friend that I want to be…..
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