He walked towards me as I came out of the store. I was already rehearsing my speech, getting my thoughts together to tell him that I couldn’t help him. He was getting closer and I remembered the conversation from the day before. The spiel he gave me and I knew it to be untrue. Here he was once more about to ask me for help, again. I didn’t care if he really needed it. He had already lied to me. Yesterday.
I was justified in what I felt and had every right to say it. In my mind I was thinking he should get a job and stop pan-handling. If he really had a wife or girlfriend to take care of, where was she? Why not go to register for a job around the corner where he could get the help he needed. Said he wanted to make an honest living but couldn’t find work. Maybe not the work he wanted. I knew there were signs all over town. Help wanted. Just like he did, these businesses were asking for help.
Why should I? He should help himself. He was gaining on me and I wasn’t going to make it to the car without having to tell him no. I was hoping to avoid talking to him again. Here he was about to hand me the same line as the day before. He’ll probably use it for alcohol or drugs. He looks like the type. How would I know? I’ve never abused those things. Never found myself in the pit with either of them. Never let anything or anyone have control over me. Never allowed myself to be under the influence of such substances.
Thank God, I am not like him! I’ve always worked for what I’ve acquired in life. Never had to beg at anybody out on the street. Never been homeless or hungry. Thank God for that! Besides I don’t have time for this guy. I don’t have anything planned. But I just don’t have the time to stop. I’m not ready to deal with this. This guy needs help that I can’t give. He’s a taker anyway, just wants a hand out. He should go to those places that can help people like him. I’m sure that they can help him and his family to get back on their feet.
Family? Maybe he doesn’t have a family. Just a girl. A friend, or lover. Oh, he really doesn’t deserve help. What if they bring another child into this world? We’ll have to help them because he won’t get a job. As I brace myself and his steps get closer, the lump in my throat gets bigger. He’s just a beggar and a sinner. I’ve never known anyone like that. That’s not what I see in the mirror anyway.
He’s coming towards me. What am I going to say? Does he really need help? Maybe he is having a hard time finding good work. Work that will provide for him and her. What if he does have kids? They might need diapers. What if he is trying to get a fresh start? Maybe he’s on the wagon and trying to stop drinking and attempting to stay away from drugs.
What if it’s her, and he just needs a hand to get her the help she needs? Maybe he just needs to talk to someone. Maybe he doesn’t know where to turn. I know Someone that he might like to meet. But all I can think is that this guy is just going to keep on asking everybody for money. He’s already hit a few other people up as he’s trying to make his way towards me. Maybe he needs a friend. Maybe he is new in town. Maybe I should talk to him. Ask him if he knows….
This parking lot is so huge. Why did I park so far away from the store I went in? Everybody and their mom is in town today! Jeez! Here he comes. Brace yourself! Get ready to tell him, “No”. Undeserving, that’s what he is! Can’t love nobody like that! He’s brought this on himself! We have nothing in common. He’s probably never been inside of a church. Clean up your act man! All I can think is how we don’t have any business together. How unlike me he is. We come from different worlds. I am cleaned up and acceptable. He is not and he can’t be.
Oh, here he is. Don’t make eye contact. Don’t turn towards him at all. Cut him off. Oh no, he’s trying to ask for help again. His voice is vaguely familiar to me though. I turn to see him. He asks me why I wouldn’t help him. Why I wouldn’t associate with Him. His tone is Grace and his voice is Love. He says something about a cup of water and being a stranger. A rooster crows. He still talks to me and says something about a test and what I was contemplating doing, that I was doing it to Him. He pulls his hoodie off of His head and I see a man in His eyes that I didn’t see before. He tells me of a greater reason to meet the man’s needs, than the ones I’ve been spinning in my mind. That I am called to a higher purpose than to judge who deserves help or not. I feel like a dog. Knowing all of this in my head, I fail to practice it in my heart. My head hangs low. How unworthy and undeserving I am to stand before this Man. I ask His forgiveness and He holds out His Hands. I run into His arms almost knocking Him down. He tells me to carry on, but always remember the lesson.
Months are passing and I look for the man as I come out of the store now. My eyes are wide open. My heart is full of more love and compassion than before for him. But now I can’t find him. I wait and scan the parking lot, but he is not there. Into the late evening, as the sky turns purple and pink, I sit and wait. On the hood of the car, I pray that I have not lost the opportunity to find this man. To offer what I didn’t before. Until then, I will keep a lookout for him. I look in the corners and I look in the shadows for ones that may need help. That may need something that they don’t deserve. For the ones who beg, for I remember that I was once the same.
For the ones who are skilled sinners, just as I have been. I look for the ones who don’t know yet just how much He Loves them. For the ones whose lives would greatly benefit from being brought to the Savior. To offer them something that I never deserved either. To look into their eyes and not see the drug habit or the criminal record. To look at their hands and see the nail scars of the Savior instead. To help lift their head and take their hands and show them to the Comforter. This is what I must do for the least of these.
I was justified in what I felt and had every right to say it. In my mind I was thinking he should get a job and stop pan-handling. If he really had a wife or girlfriend to take care of, where was she? Why not go to register for a job around the corner where he could get the help he needed. Said he wanted to make an honest living but couldn’t find work. Maybe not the work he wanted. I knew there were signs all over town. Help wanted. Just like he did, these businesses were asking for help.
Why should I? He should help himself. He was gaining on me and I wasn’t going to make it to the car without having to tell him no. I was hoping to avoid talking to him again. Here he was about to hand me the same line as the day before. He’ll probably use it for alcohol or drugs. He looks like the type. How would I know? I’ve never abused those things. Never found myself in the pit with either of them. Never let anything or anyone have control over me. Never allowed myself to be under the influence of such substances.
Thank God, I am not like him! I’ve always worked for what I’ve acquired in life. Never had to beg at anybody out on the street. Never been homeless or hungry. Thank God for that! Besides I don’t have time for this guy. I don’t have anything planned. But I just don’t have the time to stop. I’m not ready to deal with this. This guy needs help that I can’t give. He’s a taker anyway, just wants a hand out. He should go to those places that can help people like him. I’m sure that they can help him and his family to get back on their feet.
Family? Maybe he doesn’t have a family. Just a girl. A friend, or lover. Oh, he really doesn’t deserve help. What if they bring another child into this world? We’ll have to help them because he won’t get a job. As I brace myself and his steps get closer, the lump in my throat gets bigger. He’s just a beggar and a sinner. I’ve never known anyone like that. That’s not what I see in the mirror anyway.
He’s coming towards me. What am I going to say? Does he really need help? Maybe he is having a hard time finding good work. Work that will provide for him and her. What if he does have kids? They might need diapers. What if he is trying to get a fresh start? Maybe he’s on the wagon and trying to stop drinking and attempting to stay away from drugs.
What if it’s her, and he just needs a hand to get her the help she needs? Maybe he just needs to talk to someone. Maybe he doesn’t know where to turn. I know Someone that he might like to meet. But all I can think is that this guy is just going to keep on asking everybody for money. He’s already hit a few other people up as he’s trying to make his way towards me. Maybe he needs a friend. Maybe he is new in town. Maybe I should talk to him. Ask him if he knows….
This parking lot is so huge. Why did I park so far away from the store I went in? Everybody and their mom is in town today! Jeez! Here he comes. Brace yourself! Get ready to tell him, “No”. Undeserving, that’s what he is! Can’t love nobody like that! He’s brought this on himself! We have nothing in common. He’s probably never been inside of a church. Clean up your act man! All I can think is how we don’t have any business together. How unlike me he is. We come from different worlds. I am cleaned up and acceptable. He is not and he can’t be.
Oh, here he is. Don’t make eye contact. Don’t turn towards him at all. Cut him off. Oh no, he’s trying to ask for help again. His voice is vaguely familiar to me though. I turn to see him. He asks me why I wouldn’t help him. Why I wouldn’t associate with Him. His tone is Grace and his voice is Love. He says something about a cup of water and being a stranger. A rooster crows. He still talks to me and says something about a test and what I was contemplating doing, that I was doing it to Him. He pulls his hoodie off of His head and I see a man in His eyes that I didn’t see before. He tells me of a greater reason to meet the man’s needs, than the ones I’ve been spinning in my mind. That I am called to a higher purpose than to judge who deserves help or not. I feel like a dog. Knowing all of this in my head, I fail to practice it in my heart. My head hangs low. How unworthy and undeserving I am to stand before this Man. I ask His forgiveness and He holds out His Hands. I run into His arms almost knocking Him down. He tells me to carry on, but always remember the lesson.
Months are passing and I look for the man as I come out of the store now. My eyes are wide open. My heart is full of more love and compassion than before for him. But now I can’t find him. I wait and scan the parking lot, but he is not there. Into the late evening, as the sky turns purple and pink, I sit and wait. On the hood of the car, I pray that I have not lost the opportunity to find this man. To offer what I didn’t before. Until then, I will keep a lookout for him. I look in the corners and I look in the shadows for ones that may need help. That may need something that they don’t deserve. For the ones who beg, for I remember that I was once the same.
For the ones who are skilled sinners, just as I have been. I look for the ones who don’t know yet just how much He Loves them. For the ones whose lives would greatly benefit from being brought to the Savior. To offer them something that I never deserved either. To look into their eyes and not see the drug habit or the criminal record. To look at their hands and see the nail scars of the Savior instead. To help lift their head and take their hands and show them to the Comforter. This is what I must do for the least of these.
RSS Feed
